Thank you so much for all of your replies- it really does help knowing that these symptoms are normal. I have spent most of the weekend at the hospital as he has been suffering from terrible anxiety attacks (he thought he was losing his marbles) and after two days we discovered that it was all stemming from a blockage which wasn't discovered until he started to feel pain two days later. As soon as he had the tube up his nose and into his stomach to drain away all the bile all the anxiety went- amazing how your physical symptoms can affect you mentally- wish they would prepare you for these things. He is on the mend now and a lot more positive.
I had ileostomy surgery a few weeks ago, and my digestive system became paralysed after the surgery. When they put the tube down my nose and pumped out all the bile, the relief was incredible! And yes, the pain - and not knowing what is was caused by or whether anyone could fix it - was very frightening. When they'd pumped my stomach, my fear level went down a lot too.
I know they always tell you to get up and move after surgery. Personally, I find I get up and move when I am ready. I think this depends on your personality. I know that I am eager to move, to get back to being independent and doing things for myself. So when I actually feel I
don't feel well enough to get out of bed, I go with my instincts. This was true for my recent surgery. As I got better and felt better, my anxiety went down, my desire to get up came back, and I felt ready to start walking again.
For others it may be different - some people might need more encouragement and have to make themselves get up and walk, perhaps before they feel ready. This is a natural reaction too. If he feels ready to get up and do more, great. If he doesn't - that might be the right decision for him right now, but some gentle encouragement might be needed if his physical signs of health are improving and there is no obvious reason for him not to want to get up (pain, dizziness, etc. - if he is anxious about getting up and about, check with him to make sure why, as there might be a specific problem that needs addressing).
With surgery in general, everyone's recovery varies, but I think the important thing is that recovery should generally be linear. He might have times when the pain is worse, or he feels sick, or whatever, but overall you should see day by day improvements, even if those improvements are very small. If he seems to be going backwards - that's a concern. The times I've gone backwards it's been due to a complication - the paralysis after my recent surgery, and once before I developed an infection. It doesn't necessarily mean something's majorly wrong, but any sign of deterioration should be investigated by a doctor.
Whether or not he'll need surgery again is really impossible to say. I would try not to worry about that right now. The surgeon will have done everything he can to ensure that the most problematic parts have been removed, and he should keep seeing his doctors and gets the right medications, etc. to ensure he stands the best possible chance of not needing further surgery. But if he ever does, deal with that when it comes. If there is a second surgery, it won't be as scary as the first. But for now, concentrate on recovering - he's got through the hardest part; hopefully now he will feel better than before.
