DustyKat
Super Moderator
Just need to put my thoughts down, I hope no one minds.
I have such mixed emotions about my daughter. I worry and think about her every single day, not all the time, when you are busy the thoughts are pushed to the back of your mind, it's the quiet times that are the hardest.
At these times I am both angry and sad; why did this happen to my baby, why did it strike her at such a young age, it's so unfair that she has not had the opportunity to enjoy her teenage years, why does she have to suffer this burden for the rest of her life, when will she get sick again. Then there is the overwhelming despair that comes at night - what I wouldn't give for me to have this disease and not her.
And yet I am bursting with pride and awe at the incredible young woman she has become. So independent, so confident, so in control and with a wonderfully keen and earthy sense of humour. This humour always comes to the fore when I chat with her over the phone and she tells me she isn't feeling well. Try as I might, the first thing that pops into my mind is - I hope it's not Crohns. I don't say it, just think it. We will talk some more and she will laugh and say, "Oh Mum, I'm fine , I just need to eat some concrete and harden the F*** up".
Thanks for listening. It's so good to have a place where I can say these things and know that the people reading will understand.
I have such mixed emotions about my daughter. I worry and think about her every single day, not all the time, when you are busy the thoughts are pushed to the back of your mind, it's the quiet times that are the hardest.
At these times I am both angry and sad; why did this happen to my baby, why did it strike her at such a young age, it's so unfair that she has not had the opportunity to enjoy her teenage years, why does she have to suffer this burden for the rest of her life, when will she get sick again. Then there is the overwhelming despair that comes at night - what I wouldn't give for me to have this disease and not her.
And yet I am bursting with pride and awe at the incredible young woman she has become. So independent, so confident, so in control and with a wonderfully keen and earthy sense of humour. This humour always comes to the fore when I chat with her over the phone and she tells me she isn't feeling well. Try as I might, the first thing that pops into my mind is - I hope it's not Crohns. I don't say it, just think it. We will talk some more and she will laugh and say, "Oh Mum, I'm fine , I just need to eat some concrete and harden the F*** up".
Thanks for listening. It's so good to have a place where I can say these things and know that the people reading will understand.