• Welcome to Crohn's Forum, a support group for people with all forms of IBD. While this community is not a substitute for doctor's advice and we cannot treat or diagnose, we find being able to communicate with others who have IBD is invaluable as we navigate our struggles and celebrate our successes. We invite you to join us.

I love my wife :)

Greetings! My participation in this forum has been a long time coming. I want to make my first post count and introduce myself to everyone here.

My name is Alan. I'm a 27 year-old M.B.A. candidate living in Chicago, IL. I have a good job, a beautiful and loving wife, and three incredible children. Okay, well the children are cats, but that's all she and I can handle for the time being. :)

On December 31, 2009, our lives changed forever.

I couldn't put it any better than she, so read her story here.

I cannot begin to fully express what a blessing this forum has been to Marisa. I hope you all understand that this has been an incredible support system for my wife. We are here in Chicago, a thousand miles from family and friends. Thank God we have the members of this forum to offer help, encouragement, and genuine friendship.

I love my wife. I wish I could take her disease from her. I hate to see her in pain. I hate when she worries. I hate fearing the unknown.

But I have watched this forum and its members continually rally around my wife and lift her up. In seeing how her involvement with you all has effected her so positively, I came to the realization that it would be ridiculous of me to not become a part of what's going on here.

So, here I am. As I said, it's been a long time coming.

I am looking forward to learning more and getting the opportunity to be a part of the same community that has helped my wife and me so much.

-Alan
 
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Entchen

Chief Dandelion Picker
Welcome, Alan. It's nice to "meet" you! What a wonderful show of support to Marisa, you joining the forum with her.
 
Marisa has been a huge support for me as well and has offered so much encouragement and knowledge so it goes both ways :)
Nice to know you are so supportive to your wife and to the Crohn's sufferers in general. Thank-you for doing the walk for Crohn's disease and raising money for research!

Welcome :)

Wendy
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=530585394
 
Thanks Wendy! The walk was a great experience. It was kind of surreal because, while we've done charity walks before, it's never been for a condition one of us personally had. I'm glad we've been able to find ways to support Crohn's and colitis research.
 
Welcome, Alan! Marisa is certainly luck to have someone so supportive and caring on her side and we are lucky to have you both in our community!
 
ahh.. what a lovely post! welcome to the family, Alan :)

Marisa is a lovely addition to our forum, and has made a real impact since joining. it's heartwarming to hear that not only do our members benefit from being here, but their partners too!

looking forward to seeing you around the forum.
 
I agree with what others have, Marisa is a tremendously supportive, kind, sweet, always upbeat member of our little group.

You are very lucky man.

Welcome to the forum, Alan!
 

Dexky

To save time...Ask Dusty!
Location
Kentucky
You're a great husband and a better man. I'm glad we'll be hearing more from the indirect effects this disease has. No matter if you have crohn's or love someone who does, this disease has laid us bare. After Marisa's descrip in another thread of her enema experience, I'd say our lives with crohn's is an open book on this forum at least. She's lucky to have you and vice versa. Welcome.
 

Crohn's 35

Inactive Account
Welcome Alan! Marisa is a lucky girl, and I too have a wonderful husband who would walk on water for me and he is my best friend. I know he worries about me too and we are very open about everything, both of us having failing marriages, we know what it takes, and my husband always says, he takes the vows seriously...in sickness and in health, richer or poorer. It is so nice to hear from another perspective of how a Crohnies spouse's love and support. Support means so much to a Crohnie, you are a gem!
 

Astra

Moderator
Hiya Alan
thought I recognised you!

Yes, our little Marisa is as sweet as a nut! and a great contributor to this family of ours, glad to be here for her (and you too)
Big hello and welcome!!
xxx
 

Regular Joe

Senior Member
Hi Alan,

God bless you, man! Your post really captured my attention.

Your wife is blessed to have a guy that loves her enough to actively support her by joining us and learning about her disease.

I soo much know exactly how how you feel when you said "I love my wife. I wish I could take her disease from her. I hate to see her in pain."

One night a little over a year ago, I said something out loud very similar about my girlfriend. "If I could take this disease from her so that she wouldn't suffer like that, I'd do it right now."

Well...ummm..."Somebody" heard that plea I made in the night.

Maybe a month later, something very close to what I asked for started coming to pass. Eleven months later, we both found out that I, too, have Crohn's disease.

Like you said: "On December 31, 2009, our lives changed forever."

Wow can I identify with that! It's almost spooky, my friend. I know something about "forever" types of life changes.

Here's one I'll pass on to you, Alan. I picked this up from my girlfriend's mother - at first I thought she was exaggerating: "I love you more than life itself." One day recently, it came to life for me. I knew my girlfriend's mother wasn't exaggerating.

Maybe you know how that feels, Alan? If you don't, try saying it out loud (about Marisa), then forget about it for awhile (is that a setup or what?).

If your love for Marisa is anything like the love I've been given for my beloved, you have a solemn job that will stretch you beyond the limits of time and space. If I wouldn't be imposing, please allow me to suggest something: let your life be your prayer for your wife, brother.

Thanks for that little bit of "assurance", by declaring publicly that you love Marisa. You're a good man.

Welcome.
Joseph
 
Alan welcome to the forum! What a great thing for Marisa to have such a caring husband. And how lucky you are to have Marisa, I'm sure she's every bit the blessing to you as she is to this forum.
 
Marisa and Alan, you are lucky to have each other, and we as a group are lucky to have you both. Marisa is the first one to show a personal interest when I joined last month and that means a lot to me. I appreciate you both being here.
 
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AWWWWW!!! How nice Alan! Marisas posts have always helped me. It is so nice that she has you...and you have her! Bless you both! Sue
 

Silvermoon

Moderator
All I can say is.... wow....

There are not many of us "patients" out there who can be so blessed to have a spouse that loves and cares that much... in fact, such and illness can and has caused divorce....

I have had CD since I was 11, but my husband of 12 years has taken way more interest in my disease than my parents ever did. He is not one to join forums and make a lot of posts (mostly cause he SUCKS at typing!! LOL!)... but it would not surprise me if he is reading this...he "lurks" alot on all kinds of sites.... both medical and "anecdotal", if you will.... looking for information for me and himself, in trying to find things that help.... see if other people are experiencing what I am so I can "normalize" it for myself....

He is my rock, literally, ..... even when he pisses my off by not picking up his dirty socks.... LOL!!

May you both continue to love and grow together. All the best.
 
:Wow!
I'm actually choked reading your post, Alan, and all the ones about your wonderful wife - you 2 sound like an amazing team.

I'm lucky - I have a fabulous husband who has told me clearly he'll never stop loving or taking care of me, even, as I put it, "when I'm smelly and completely incontinent". Now THAT'S love!:lol:

I can see I'm going to grow to love this forum and the people on it very quickly.
 

Nyx

Moderator
Welcome Alan, it's nice to see a partner of a Crohnie on here, and it will be nice to hear your point of view as well. Keep up the support, it really is invaluable :)
 
I continue to be incredibly touched, inspired, and blessed at all the positive feedback every one of you has given not only to me, but now my husband.

I found this forum at a very lonely time in my life, despite my husband's constant presence and love. I was friendless and felt a great burden dumping all my heartache and suffering on my husband. I cherish each friendship I've managed to cultivate due to this forum and can't express truly how grateful I am for the people that I have met and had a chance to talk to.

I'm so excited and happy that now Alan can experience the love, support, advice, and laughter that you all have given me! Having people in my life (though digital) know EXACTLY what I'm going through and not judge me when the need to vent and whine comes about has brightened my spirit.

You all are truly a special gift!
 
I completely agree with everything Marisa has said.

At first, I'll be honest, I was feeling a little left out that she was spending her time "talking to strangers" about what was going on rather than talking to me. The only thing was, she was talking to me - I just wasn't hearing her.

My wife needed a support system. And, while I have never been anything but supportive for her, I still had to leave at times. I had to go to work. I had to go to school. I couldn't always be around. So, when that was the case, she would turn to "strangers."

After she kicked me in the ass and helped me see the light, my attitude has completely changed.

You, NONE of you, are strangers to either my wife or myself. You are family. You are people who share something with us both on an extremely moving and profound level. Our lives are better with you in them. We are both so blessed to have your support and understanding as we march into battle day after day.

I cannot thank you all enough for the inspiration you have offered. I know with confidence that I can speak for both Marisa and me when I say that we love you all and cherish the relationships built and the light that has shone through what could have been the darkest period of our lives.

I am humbled and honored to be a part of this forum.
 
Hi Alan and welcome. It is so cool that you are so supportive of Marisa, she is a kind and very empathetic young lady and you are both very lucky to have one another. Hold tight to one another, family members and friends can drop away into the background when things get tough and they very often do. However, with the love and belief in one another you have strength and can walk through anything together. I wish for you both all of the love, health, and happiness that you so deserve.
 
Hello Alan and welcome to our haven here at the Crohn's Forum.
You both are richly blessed indeed.
A caring and loving partner can make all the difference in the world.
Marisa is a very sweet and lucky lady.

Thank you for joining!! :ysmile:
 
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