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12-17-2010, 04:35 PM   #1
StarGirrrrl
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Single people- we do exist!

Am I the only singleton who gets fed up with schmaltzy " I love my fella" or "All I want for Christmas is something tall, cuddly,strong and handsome with a sprinkling of tattoos and a temptingly sweet centre. Oh, I already have that :d" Status updates on facebook??

Oh and the moaning they may as well be on their own since shift work partner is never there. Well you're not on your own so count yourself lucky!

It's like it's being rammed down my throat how lonely I am, and I am already well aware of it. People in couples are so selfish. They don't stop to think how lonely I am, whereas I stop to think how nice it must be for them.
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2006. Tummy issues (more IBD than IBS).
2009 joint pain/worsening tummy issues.
CRP 20-36 2006-now. C3/C4 inflammation markers huge,
2014 IDA & low B12.

June 2014 admitted to Hospital 3 nights as emergency transfused 2 units of blood. Dangerous case of anaemia.
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Waiting on blood & stool results from January.

Hoping to stop anaemia treatment soon & lower B12 daily dose!

Last edited by StarGirrrrl; 12-17-2010 at 04:41 PM.
12-17-2010, 04:44 PM   #2
Jennjenn
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I am single and have the hope that I will find someone! I am happy for the people who I am friends with that are in a relationships. I just hope that I can be in one again also soon I put up my Christmas tree alone ( well my dog was by my side! ) last night and felt that I would like to enjoy those moments with someone!
I do not feel that I get fed up with hearing about positive things with the people that I know....I hope the best for them!
12-17-2010, 04:51 PM   #3
StarGirrrrl
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Yeah I hope for the best for my friends too but I am 23 and spent my whole life alone. So I get fed up when it's shoved in my face (because that is how I feel), just wish they would consider my feelings once in a while. Instead of bragging how happy they are or telling me I will meet someone soon. Well I have news for them been waiting 10 years for that so excuse me if I don't want to hear that again either.

Last edited by StarGirrrrl; 12-17-2010 at 04:54 PM.
12-17-2010, 04:55 PM   #4
Cat-a-Tonic
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I only have one friend on FB that does that, and it's kind of funny actually. About half her status updates are, "I love my hot handsome boyfriend!" but the other half of her status updates are more along the lines of, "I don't understand men and I'm so upset and how could he be such a JERK!!" The good news is, FB has a "block" option so you don't have to read the constant updates of people posting how much they wuv their smushy wushy cutie pie.

The loneliness will get better too, I promise. I've been there done that. The loneliest time of my life was the time after one of my best friends passed away. He was a person I could tell anything to, and after he passed I had so much emotion that I wanted to express, but the one person I wanted to express it to was gone! It was hands-down the worst and loneliest time of my life. I felt like I had nobody. But it slowly got better and I made other friends and eventually fell in love and got married. It will get better for you too.
12-17-2010, 04:57 PM   #5
StarGirrrrl
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Thanks for the kind words Cat But I am 23 and barely able to leave the house right now, not looking like that will change. I've been waiting for a bf since I was 13 so safe to say it's not going to happen anytime soon, and now I have to find someone who wants me despite being sick, and despite that I have decided not to have kids. So my "pool" has narrowed somewhat!
12-17-2010, 05:08 PM   #6
Cat-a-Tonic
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There really should be a dating service catering to people with chronic illnesses or specifically IBD. Maybe they can make a new subforum for crohnie/UC singles looking to meet other singles in their area! Seriously though, I'm sorry that you don't have many dating options. I hope you able to find a nice guy who likes to stay in and read or watch movies.
12-17-2010, 06:33 PM   #7
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Chin up, i know this might be easier said than done, but just try to let it wash over you. Its most likely that their 'bragging' is simply their happiness overflowing and they CARE about YOU so much that they want to share their happiness with you, because you're a dear friend to them.

I hope a nice girl is out there for me, but i know there's no point in worrying or stressing about it. It won't make it happen any quicker if there is someone for me.

I'm quite happy that whilst there isn't currently, i can enjoy the single life with all the benefits such as plenty of time for my interests and my money being mine!! lol

Try to look at the positives in your current situation (i don't pretend to know your situation so that might be easy to do or that might be hard to do) and try to keep in good spirits and hopefully you'll be up and about and out of the house, more happy, confident, and who knows, you just might meet mr right!!!!

i'd rather be single than with someone who isn't right for me, i haven't met that person yet so until i do, i'm going to enjoy life (oops that sounds like i wont after...lol - you know what i mean!)

Last edited by Liverpool FC; 12-17-2010 at 06:39 PM.
12-18-2010, 07:12 AM   #8
Welsh-bird
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Hi StarGirrrl,
Sorry that you're feeling this way.
I too am single, but am loving it right now. I like the freedom it gives me, but do have the occasional moment when like Jennjen, I wish there was someone there to share that special moment. Christmas, I think just highlights the 'schamltzy' loving going on around us. I'm also lucky that my friends don't seem to be shoving this down my throat, but they do have this need to be constantly searching out their single friends in the hope that they may be able to hook me up! I just take it in my stride now, and ride it out. When it's meant to be, I'm sure I will find that 'special' someone, and most probably when I'm not actively searching for him.
Hope 2011 will be a better year for you.
Andrea
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12-18-2010, 07:24 AM   #9
Agent X20
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I'd take the "happy couple" stuff with a pinch of salt... they may be trying to convince themselves rather than you.
I will admit to being very happily married now... but it took 50 years to get to this stage.
I spent a good few Christmas days on my own, without speaking to a soul from waking up in the morning to going to bed at night, and it would have been a lot easier without the "happies" commenting on how sad it was.
I can say quite confidently that you really are better off on your own than in a bad relationship.
All this may sound a bit gloomy and pessimistic... it isn't meant to be. If you don't get stressed about it the right person will creep up on you while you're not looking.
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12-18-2010, 07:36 AM   #10
robbo87
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I know how you feel star girl, im 23 and a long time singleton aswell, and lately all my friends have started settling down with partners. Tbh though i've found its best not to dwell on it and just enjoy being single and loving life the best i can before i get a big thumb over my head lol. Of course sometimes i wish things where different. But i have a great bunch of friends and at the moment i have no real need for anything more.

Chances are someone will come along when you're not expecting it!...
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12-18-2010, 08:20 AM   #11
StarGirrrrl
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Thanks for the kind words everyone. Just hard to see any positives in my life right now and I feel the last thing I need are reminders of my single state. 95% of my friends are paired up, and I am the last one still living at home. I have had no life for the past 16 months and the foreseeable future, to speak of, and it's very lonely. Until I get diagnosed and start treatment things are not going to change. And I am finding it hard to get help from the Hospital.

Not even sure if I can have colonoscopy Weds now, not been able to keep any food in since Wednesday after a coldy bug, now so empty water is reacting badly. If i'm being picky about it been waiting for scope since August. Got to ring Endoscopy unit Monday for advice.

And after 10 years, I am rather fed up of people telling me I will meet someone when I least expect it, had to listen to that for said 10 years and long since stopped believing in it, sorry! Haha.
12-18-2010, 09:45 AM   #12
Astra
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After me and hubby split up I was lonely too!
I went on DatingDirect.com online dating and had such a ball! We had a right laugh, cheered me up no end! It has instant messenger and I made lots of male friends and met a few of them! The chatting online soon stopped me feeling lonely. With online chatting you can talk about anything, don't have to declare you're ill, be yourself and have fun!
I also joined Match.com, and met Mark. 18 months later we're still together!
But he lives 28 miles away and this weekend we're both totally snowed in, so feeling really fed up and depressed. Hopefully things will get moving next week.
Get logged on, you've got nothing to lose but so much to gain!
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12-18-2010, 10:30 AM   #13
Welsh-bird
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Match.com here I come!
12-18-2010, 10:30 AM   #14
My Butt Hurts
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StarGirrrrl meet Robbo.
Maybe you two 23 year olds should get together for a drink. Are you about 2 hours away from each other?
12-18-2010, 01:34 PM   #15
Astra
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What a great idea MBH!
but Robbo is hundreds of miles away from Suffolk but only 15 minutes from me!!
12-19-2010, 11:37 AM   #16
robbo87
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Should get a bit of a blind date thread goin lol
12-19-2010, 01:11 PM   #17
mario
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Martin don't be shy. Send stargirl a pm. What you got to lose? Wouldn't it be great if the forum had its first wedding!!
12-19-2010, 04:10 PM   #18
StarGirrrrl
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Heheheh see you've already got us married off

Doing better today. Decided yesterday after water sent me to the loo enough was enough. So started popping lopermide and had 2 bread rolls. By the evening water going down so much easier. Still going with the lopermide today and been eating bread and crisps. What are anti-D meds for if not times like these! Tomorrow may take some more, may not. See how things go. Certainly planning on eating quite a bit, wasn't going too, to lessen the effects of the prep but so hungry, haven't been keeping food in since Weds.

And the friend whose status I highlighted I decided to put on ignore. Mainly because she posted yet another whining status "boo hoo can't go out partying because of the weather so angry" haha. She's not the only one who posts the lovey dovey stuff but none of the others do quite so much whining and wind me up so much lol.
12-19-2010, 04:15 PM   #19
robbo87
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Glad you are doing better and good luck with the prep!

Also, just thought i'd add not to worry if you havent been keeping food and drink down etc

Before my first colonoscopy i had barely been eating at all, and didnt manage to drink a lot of my prep because i couldnt keep it down but they still managed to do the procedure just fine so i wouldnt worry about it too much!
12-19-2010, 08:07 PM   #20
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There really should be a dating service catering to people with chronic illnesses or specifically IBD. Maybe they can make a new subforum for crohnie/UC singles looking to meet other singles in their area! Seriously though, I'm sorry that you don't have many dating options. I hope you able to find a nice guy who likes to stay in and read or watch movies.
Haha I've thought about this before, but then decided it would be a horrible idea as I'm not sure how I'd feel about someone else using up MY PRECIOUS time on my toilet! Although I guess it would be do able if they lived in a house with two toilets.
12-19-2010, 09:51 PM   #21
EthanPSU
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I feel the same in alot of ways. Although at college there are alot of girls that are around and that I get with I still always feel the same in that I would just like for one to stay. It gets old just talking to a girl for less then a couple days and would rather find someone thats a challenge and stays for the long run
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