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03-15-2013, 02:25 PM   #31
723crossroads
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So thankful for you all!
03-19-2013, 07:31 PM   #32
mwkwmn
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As a update my wife is divorcing me and she has no emotions what so ever it's though as I didn't even exist. I am having a hard time because I loved someone who fell out of love with me and started having affairs and blamed me for the reason she fell out of love but still denying the affairs. My crohns has flared due to stress and I have to have a scope on April 1. This will be the first one without her there. I'm trying to find strength to get through this and I'm not doing a good job. I had to move in with my parents and I'm having to deal with the foreclosure of our house cause my wife has gotten her an apartment and has walked away from all ofvthe responsibilities this sucks so bad.
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mwkwmn
Dx
Crohns 1993
Adrenal insufficiency 2005
Blood clots 2006
Low testosterone 2006
Osteoporosis 2011

Meeds
Prednisone 7.5 mg
Lortab
Zoloft
Coumadin
Entocort
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Testosterone inj
Citrical with D
03-19-2013, 08:15 PM   #33
Hope345
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MKWMN,

I am so sorry you have to do this step to get on with your life. How can she blame anyone but herself for her actions? Do not let her make you feel like you are to blame for what she did.!!!!! and does that give her an excuse for her being so uncaring now? You have to remove yourself from the situation and see her for what she is. You need to get mad, and you will eventually. That is the only way to deal with people like that.

You are not deserving of her actions, and frankly no one would be.

so this is the beginning of your life surrounded by people who are worth being around. You will probably analyze this until you make yourself sick, and I wish you wouldnt. It is an important step for you to move on past that as quick as you can. Remember, you will never make sense out of her actions.

Having all of this happen at once, is hard, I know it is. But for now, you will be with parents who love you and that is so great.

This life is temporary and anyone who knows you, realizes this is not your fault. We are all here for you too.
Your health is very important, and you need to take care of yourself right now.

I wish you the best
03-19-2013, 08:21 PM   #34
mwkwmn
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Thank you so much I can't do anything but cry and hurt over everything. I have to go out to our house and start moving stuff and I just remember everything that happened in that house and most were bad memories. Just seeing her and my brother in the hot tub the reminder just hurts so bad. I so bad want to get through the grieving part but it seems to linger.
03-19-2013, 09:43 PM   #35
723crossroads
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And it will linger for awhile, but then slowly you will start to feel it lift. You will find things or people which make you feel better and your life will change. Some day, you'll wake up and smile and thank God you are alive, because someone out there loves you and she is all you ever wanted!!!
03-21-2013, 11:24 AM   #36
mwkwmn
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I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for all of your support. Stress is huge factor in crohns and unfortunately we encounter stress of all kinds that directly impact our condition. It's good to know that there are people whom we don't even know except through this forum that we can vent to and they show compassion and care. I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart because it means so much to me.
03-21-2013, 01:24 PM   #37
CLynn
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Stress is most definately a factor, and most of us internalize our stress it seems. Do you take anything for your nerves or depression? Sending hugs to you right now....I know it sucks, but remember that God has MUCH MORE in store for you, better and lasting.
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Cheryl
Diagnosed:1988
Previous meds: Sulfadiazine, Flagyl, Prednisone, Imuran, Pentasa, Asacol
Surgeries: re-section 2004
Currently taking: B-12 injections every 2 weeks, multi vitamin/mineral, fish oil (1000 mg), D3 (5000 mg)

Also lucky enough to have psoriasis as well.
03-21-2013, 01:45 PM   #38
mwkwmn
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Yes they started me on zoloft and adivan which does help. I believe god has something better for me and I know I have to be patient. I'm doing the very best I can at this time and hope soon I will be able to get mad and replace all of the hurt.
03-21-2013, 02:21 PM   #39
CLynn
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When things get really stressful, and I don't think I can take ONE MORE THING....I think of this story:
Malachi 3:3 says: "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver."

The story is told about some women in a Bible study who were puzzled by this verse.
They wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver.

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God allowing us to be in fires of life, then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver." She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined.

The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it."

(Original source of this story unknown.)


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03-21-2013, 03:44 PM   #40
723crossroads
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That is awesome C. Thankyou!
03-21-2013, 03:59 PM   #41
CeeCeeGo
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Stress is huge factor in crohns and unfortunately we encounter stress of all kinds that directly impact our condition.
Hello
I found that stress really aggravated my Crohns. I was lucky to get some therapy and I found this really helpful. My therapist introduced me to mindfulness (http://www.freemindfulness.org/download) and I have found that taking 10-15 mins a day just to relax, breathe and listen to some soothing music has helped me to focus on me and not my troubles.
I know you are going through a really tough time at the moment but things will get better and you have a lot of people on here that care about you and are rooting for you.
Take care and make some time every day just for you - you deserve it!
Hugs 😎
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Carol

DX - June 2012 with mild/moderate Crohns. In July 2012 bowel perforated unexpectedly and needed emergency surgery.
Current meds/supplements - Budesonide (reducing dose over 3 months), B12 injections (every 10 wks), Vit D tabs 800iu x daily, Ferrous Sulphate 200mg every day, Folic Acid once a week
Previous meds - Allergic to Azathioprine, 6MP, Pentasa & Asacol, Methotrexate injections (didn't work). Stopped Humira after 2 years due to ineffectiveness.
03-21-2013, 04:04 PM   #42
sickofcrohns
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mwkmwn, I hope you have retained a lawyer -- a good lawyer. You need someone who will fight like a bulldog to make sure your soon-to-be-ex will not push you around in court and have you come out of the divorce worse than what you're already dealing with. Make sure you know your rights!
03-21-2013, 04:18 PM   #43
CLynn
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That is awesome C. Thankyou!
I love it, Teresa. Speaks to me alot in the last couple of years.
03-21-2013, 08:59 PM   #44
723crossroads
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I have heard about the refiner's fire, but never the way you put it. I just loved that!
03-21-2013, 09:32 PM   #45
mwkwmn
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That is understandable I believe I am in the middle of the fire right now. I for the life of me do not know why I am not able to handle this I guess I'm in shock. Thanks for the kind words
03-22-2013, 08:54 AM   #46
mwkwmn
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hey everyone I just wanted to give everyone a update. I think I have started slowly getting angry as I woke up this morning not feeling as if everything is so grim. that being said I am starting to get a little angry and this is not my norm. I hope this feeling takes over as it is more bearable than the sadness and hurt. I know I may go back and forth with my feelings but I think this is progress, and most important my stomach is actually feeling better this morning also. I know it will be a long road and I hope I have not overstepped my boundaries in focusing on more of what has happened to me than just the crohns component. I felt though this is such a good support group and the stress we go through directly effects our disease. Again thanks for your ongoing support and I will keep you updated as I endure this journey.

Mark
03-22-2013, 10:14 AM   #47
723crossroads
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Hi again sweetie!
I 'm glad the anger kicked in, it really does help you through. I was angry for 18 of the 20 yrs. with my first husband. When he committed suicide, it made me even angrier because it was to hurt me again and my kids. It eventually faded to, I don't care anymore, Life goes on. But, it affected my kids in such a detrimental way. They both got hooked on heroin for 8-10 yrs. My son is clean one yr. and daughter is still on medication for it. It may never go away for her, (that craving) but God can take it away. I know people who have had that happen. Hang in there tough guy! You are doing great and we are all praying for you!!!!!
03-22-2013, 11:33 AM   #48
mwkwmn
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I can't tell you how it makes you feel so weak not strong but looking at it from the outside with everything I've been dealing with it does take a strong person to get through it. I know god has given me that strength and I'm looking forward to getting stronger. Thanks again for all support.
03-22-2013, 11:41 AM   #49
CLynn
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I think the anger is normal, and a good thing, will let you feel your strength. Hugs, Mark!
03-23-2013, 06:36 PM   #50
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I live in a marriage where my spouse knows he can do anything. Because where am I going to go? I've cut off a lot of relationships because it's just too hard to attend many family gatherings, wedding, funerals, etc. Have you ever noticed that most get-togethers revolve around food? Well, food doesn't like me. Travelling is hard. And I can't just go out and work a normal schedule. I'm glad that I have a computer to write to people who know that this disease affect everything. I cannot find understanding anywhere else.
03-23-2013, 06:50 PM   #51
Hope345
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Mwkmn: Yes!!! So glad you are feeling better. and not letting others get the best of you!!

My dear Crossroads, I had no idea you have dealt with so much too.

Misunderstood: You do have us, that is for sure, but no one has the right to "do anything" to you just because you are sick....

hugs to all!!!!
03-23-2013, 06:59 PM   #52
mwkwmn
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Everyone here is awesome to talk to. No matter what the problems are you guys are supportive and comforting as we each travel down our lifes path. For someone to take advantage of someone with this disease is terrible. Instead we should receive support and comfort especially from our loved ones. I can only hope that going through this pain will make me a stronger person and to realize that people are not as understandable as we would hope so we have to seek that support from the people that knows what we are dealing with. Hugs to everyone and hope that someday these tears of sadness will be replaced with tears of happiness.
03-23-2013, 10:29 PM   #53
723crossroads
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Me too friend, me too! I just know they will. Coz you deserve it!
03-24-2013, 01:12 PM   #54
mwkwmn
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Hey guys I'm hurting really bad on my lower right side and having the big D. I know it's from all of the stress I am going through but I definitely think I am in the middle of a flare. Even taking lortab 10 it's not controlling the pain and I am miserable. I have a follow up with my primary care physician whom ideally like on Tuesday and I go to St Louis Sunday to be scoped by my GI. I hope I can make it till then. I I'm I know the stress is going to continue but does anyone have any suggestions to lessen the flare. You all are so knowledgeable and I value your opinions and suggestions greatly.
Thank you
Mark
03-24-2013, 02:53 PM   #55
723crossroads
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Hey guys I'm hurting really bad on my lower right side and having the big D. I know it's from all of the stress I am going through but I definitely think I am in the middle of a flare. Even taking lortab 10 it's not controlling the pain and I am miserable. I have a follow up with my primary care physician whom ideally like on Tuesday and I go to St Louis Sunday to be scoped by my GI. I hope I can make it till then. I I'm I know the stress is going to continue but does anyone have any suggestions to lessen the flare. You all are so knowledgeable and I value your opinions and suggestions greatly.
Thank you
Mark
I wish I could help you M. But I don't know. My suggestion would be to talk to Dusty or David, forum administrator. They have great knowledge!!! I will try to get them to come to this site and talk to you> ok?
03-24-2013, 02:55 PM   #56
mwkwmn
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Ok
03-24-2013, 02:59 PM   #57
723crossroads
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Meantime, I'm saying a prayer for you, hang in there! Hugs!!!!
03-24-2013, 03:05 PM   #58
DustyKat
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It is good to hear that you have appointments coming up!

The one thing I would suggest that may help rest the bowel and reduce symptoms is EEN (Exclusive Enteral Nutrition) There are various products available that can be taken orally, have a look at the EEN forum. The top sticky has loads of info. It will provide you with all your nutritional requirements without stressing the bowel.

If that is not an option then go to low residue foods. Some people find the BRAT (an acronym for Banana, Rice, Apple sauce, Toast) diet helpful, it is essentially low residue. The foods are bland and tend to be 'white' in colour.

Dusty. xxx
03-24-2013, 03:07 PM   #59
mwkwmn
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Thank you so much
03-24-2013, 03:10 PM   #60
723crossroads
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It is good to hear that you have appointments coming up!

The one thing I would suggest that may help rest the bowel and reduce symptoms is EEN (Exclusive Enteral Nutrition) There are various products available that can be taken orally, have a look at the EEN forum. The top sticky has loads of info. It will provide you with all your nutritional requirements without stressing the bowel.

If that is not an option then go to low residue foods. Some people find the BRAT (an acronym for Banana, Rice, Apple sauce, Toast) diet helpful, it is essentially low residue. The foods are bland and tend to be 'white' in colour.

Dusty. xxx
Thankyou Dusty, I should of thought of the brat diet,because it did help me. I just couldn't think of anything.
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