My docotor told me Gluten-free isnt really going to help. You have helped me out A LOT. Im just a little curious about, even if eat certain things and dont get upset with it... is it still damaging my insides. Im scared of getting surgery and I dont want to have a poop bag on me. And I want to have a good pregnancy. (In the future)
I have a "poop bag" - it's not so bad! It's unlikely you will do yourself any harm in that sense from eating. Having a good doctor, finding the right medications and getting regular testing is the best way to stay on top of the disease. You may well find that some foods make you
feel bad - they will increase symptoms, but won't do lasting damage. Gluten-free helps people with coeliac disease, and if your doctor tells you it won't help, he's most likely ruled out coeliac disease and is right to tell you that it's ok for you to eat gluten. You're more likely to do much more subtle damage to your health through a poor diet over a long-term period than to somehow make your Crohn's worse by eating the wrong foods.
Keep your diet balanced and simple to start with - try making each meal contain some kind of protein (meat, fish, eggs, dairy) and carbohydrate (pasta, potatoes, rice), and have sweet things and treats for snacks. Make sure your weight is healthy - this is the most important thing regarding fertility. Try cutting down on fibrous foods, as suggested in the previous posts, and other foods that people with Crohn's often find problems - things like very greasy food, spicy food, caffeine, alcohol - some people have problems with these foods, others don't; spend some time testing out whether or not you do. But
don't stress over your diet too much! If you have family or friends who you think eat healthily, try eating what they eat with them.
Personally, I would avoid diets such as Paleo, Specific Carbohydrate Diet, FODMAP diet, etc. They can be extreme, and if you're struggling over fear of food, they may well just reinforce those fears (without good reason) because they are so rigid and tell you to cut out so many things from your diet. There's no good evidence they will help you. They make social eating very difficult. It really sounds to me that you don't need an extreme, restrictive diet at this point.
If you don't mind my asking (feel free not to answer), are you a healthy weight at the moment? If you're underweight, you may like to ask your doctor about supplements such as Ensure and Fortisip. These may be helpful to you even if your weight is normal - they contain all the vitamins, minerals, protein, carbohydrate and fats you need. They're like flavoured milkshakes (you can also get some that are like juices, or savoury ones like soups). Some people use them in place of meals, but you can also drink them alongside having your ordinary food. I think they could help you as they mean you don't have to worry about whether your diet is providing all the nutrients you need, so if you're not doing well getting fruit and veg in, if you're drinking a couple of these a day, you'll still be getting your vitamins, and you can concentrate on finding foods that don't upset your digestive system and which you like to eat. Your doctor may prescribe them or you can buy similar products such as Complan in supermarkets and chemists. If you find yourself really stuck and struggling to know what to choose for your next meal, you can have the supplement and know it's good for you.