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09-22-2015, 06:11 PM   #1
pephuka
 
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Rome, Italy

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hello from Italy!

hello from italy!

surfing the internet I just found this forum, I guess it's better now than never!

I've been diagnosed with crohn on june 2013, when I had surgery with seton because of a perianal fistula. it didn't really change much in my (nonexistent) love life, but being gay when rare dates happen it's so humiliating to explain and see the other's face shift to disgust... so I put all my efforts in healthy eating

happy poo everyone!
09-23-2015, 12:50 PM   #2
nogutsnoglory
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Location: New York

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Welcome to the forum. I'm sorry you're struggling with a fistula. Those stink literally and figuratively.

It's definitely a hard thing to share with others. I would refrain from saying it too early on in dating. Let someone get to know you and care about you and then you can introduce the fact that you have a Seton and a problem down there. Hopefully they will care for you and not run away in fear.
09-23-2015, 01:51 PM   #3
Kat123
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Hi Pephuka,

Welcome. I am also new to the forum and also have a perianal fistula with seton in situ since February this year.

Sorry to hear about your dating experiences. Earlier this year, I was on my second date with my now current boyfriend. I had a massive abscess which had burst very messily earlier that day, was running a fever and in significant pain. I told him that night that I had Crohn's disease, and on our third date (which took place on my sofa) about the perianal stuff.

I think I was incredibly lucky to meet someone at that time who would accept me and could see through to who I am, despite the problems I was going through. Really, these people are out there so don't give up hope

I'd echo Nogutsnoglory in saying maybe don't tell them too soon though. In my case it was difficult not to since I was clearly very unwell and could barely sit down, and making the biggest fuss about having to find a bar with comfortable armchairs ;-)
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