Crohn's Disease Forum » Support Forum » Vent Away » Un flipping believable!! Can it get worse??


02-23-2016, 07:54 PM   #1
tots
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Un flipping believable!! Can it get worse??

I am so flipping mad I can hardly breath, ya know when you can hear your heart beat in your ears? You have trouble typing because your hands are trembling?
Yep, that kind of mad!!

My dear wonderful husband- :row:, he's a bit judgmental- esp since going back to church 5 yrs ago. A few months ago he asked me if Ihad ever given my life to god? Your kidding right? We were baptized together 18 yrs ago. I was unaware I needed to renew my subscription!!

So he was telling me that I need to take a probiotic, I would be better if I did and my Dr told me to do it and if I just followed his directions I wouldn't be sick. Ok, I ask, how do you now this? Because you dont go to any dr appts with me. Never have but, when you had your parents stay with you for the results on my colonoscopy you lost my trust. Having your mom call me at work to ask me what it was like to find out that nothing has ever really been wrong me, not good Joe not good! When I was in the hospital you took a day off because I was sick. Huh,
you stayed home and slept all day-so ya missed that round of appts too.

So back to how you have any knowledge my dr ordered me to take probiotics?
Ahhhh, because you work at a grocery store two nights a week- one of your customers who "was much worse off the you are" took them and has never needed any pain meds again!?! How in the *&%$ do you know a customer well enough to judge the severity of my disease against- i am guessing_ hers?? Lets put this into perspective- I am out of remission and use less than 90 pills a YEAR! One freaking pill at a time. It is my belief my pain does not need to disappear just take the edge off. Pain is a good indicator somethings going wrong. I have NEVER been impaired by medication. I don't drink alcohol.


OK, I have tried probiotics over the years- not a huge fan. I have trouble getting
past the stomach ache and diarrhea. Plus I take so many pills each day already
it all overwhelms me. This is not for him to judge!!!

I am 52, I have been with him since we started dating in HS at 16. Now tell me I don't feel as if I somehow knew he was an ***, and should have left a long long time ago.

I don't think I can emotionally survive much more from him. I am lonely and tired, I obviously am not feeling well. I am to tired to cry. Thank god I have three great kids, and this forum. even if I don't post reading about everyone else gives me a connection!!

Thank you for "listening"

Lauren
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Diagnosed= 1992 and again Feb 2012 Confirmed with
CT enterography May 2015 !!


Waiting for the ok from my Ins company to restart Remicade. Will also start Imuron to get into remission!
I know it's out there somewhere and I WILL find it!


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02-23-2016, 08:43 PM   #2
Trysha
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Hello Tots
Sorry you are feeling so bad and hope you may have a bit of release letting go of it here.
It is so sad that some of our nearest and dearest fail to recognize the agonies of mind and body that we go through.
Would it be any help to speak with a counsellor?
You are clearly unwell right now...when is your next GI appointment?
It might be helpful to you to have a word with your doctor for a review...there may be something helpful that Meds could do .
Feel better soon
Hugs and best wishes
Trysha
02-23-2016, 09:38 PM   #3
tots
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Thanks Trysha-

Things will even out in the morning. They always do.
I just need to find my support elsewhere.

Thank you for your kind words,

Lauren
02-23-2016, 11:14 PM   #4
ronroush7
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Sending support.
02-24-2016, 02:51 AM   #5
fuzzy butterfly
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Aw lauren. I feel for you hun. I bet you could rip his head off n s**t in his neck 😠. I know iv felt that way with a few folks.
Sending big hugs,you know we are always here for you hun. lots of love 💕💕💕💋💋Mandy
02-24-2016, 05:37 AM   #6
Salad_Shooter
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My younger sister told me I was so sick because I wasn't praying hard enough or using the right words to speak to God.

Yep. There's a meme on the interwebz that says, "Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9".

I'm sorry you're having to deal with his bad behavior.
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02-24-2016, 11:04 AM   #7
Cat-a-Tonic
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My husband was similar the first year that I was sick - he thought I was making it up or at least exaggerating how bad things were, that I couldn't possibly be as sick as I said I was or couldn't possibly be sick all the time. He had never been ill like that so he just couldn't wrap his head around it and therefore he didn't think it was real.

Then, something magical happened - he got kidney stones and they were impacted. So for about 6 months, thanks to the impacted stones, he had pain that could come on out of nowhere, pain that could debilitate him, make him vomit, cause him to miss social events, land him in the ER. Sometimes he'd be stuck in the bathroom for a long time, puking and trying to pass urine. He was constantly at the doctor. He was miserable and he never knew when the symptoms would hit, and there was nothing he could do or take to stop the episodes (vicodin only made him loopy but didn't even take the edge off of his pain). Sound familiar? Yep, it was a tough time for him, but it was an invaluable time for me because he had a taste of what my life is like and now he actually gets it and things are much improved. Some people need to experience chronic illness firsthand in order to wrap their heads around it. It sounds weird to say but kidney stones basically saved my marriage. Tots, I hope your husband can have a similarly eye-opening experience too.
02-24-2016, 12:36 PM   #8
scottsma
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Sending you hugs and support Lauren.It's sad that you're not getting the support you need from your family,when you need it most.Family support goes a long way in helping us cope,and lack of it can only make you feel depressed,angry,and worthless on top of everything else.I really don't know how you can make them understand.But we're always here,so you can give vent and give us a good kicking whenever you need to.And you'll always get our support and understanding.
02-24-2016, 04:51 PM   #9
ronroush7
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Anen
02-24-2016, 04:52 PM   #10
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Amen
02-26-2016, 02:12 AM   #11
tots
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Its great to have people hear and understand you. That you are all going through the same thing is so valuable in knowledge as well as the support!

Thank you guys for responding!!

Lauren
02-26-2016, 02:23 AM   #12
fuzzy butterfly
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Your welcome Lauren. Big hugs 💕💕💕
02-26-2016, 04:51 PM   #13
Christi
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Lauren i just want to send you support and let you know that we are here for you if you need to talk at any time. Hugs
02-28-2016, 01:58 AM   #14
tots
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Thank you Christi!
Just logging on and knowing you can read or participate with people just like we are- is so helpful.

I am going back to my Dr this week to see if working right now is in best interest.




Lauren
02-28-2016, 03:19 AM   #15
fuzzy butterfly
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Ye that is a good shout lauren. If you can get by without working it maybe wise to take a break if you can. I know when i was at my worst i was dragging my sorry ass into work,when i could barely stand,because i couldnt afford to be off n with no help available from the government i would have lost my home as it is rented. How bad is that.. coz i could wipe my own bum and make a brew i wasnt ill enough to get help...argh insert loud scream here. It nearly killed me tbh n ended up with surgery. If it wasnt for my mum helping me with money id have been done for. As i had to have 4mths off at one op and 3 off at 2nd op. Im still trying to pay her back now 12mths after last borrow.
I hope that you can take a break from work n not end up in debt. If you can do it do it. I wish i would have been able to. Best wishes n hugs 💕💕💕
02-29-2016, 09:30 AM   #16
NiKo_V
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With Peace & Love Always

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