03-24-2011, 11:42 PM   #1
Britt31109
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Angry

I am angry! I am sick of being in pain, I am so sick of using all my time to go to doctors to be pricked and scanned and injected with meds that make me feel like a zombie and that could lead to complications that could kill me! I had to give up nursing school and work because I am always bleeding! I am getting married in 6 months but most of the time I have no energy to plan anything!!!!!! I feel like a horrible mother because I will be on the couch while he plays alone. I am sick of having to try to explain to everyone why I am the way I am. Why are people so MEAN! If they want to trade places then they can go ahead. Stupidest of all, I have so much freaking gas that I feel like a man! How am I supposed to feel good anyway when I am farting every min, and you can forget about trying to hold it in because then I will look even wierder doubled over in pain. I am only 20 and I am on anxiety meds and if I get mad at someone they automatically ask if I took my meds! WTH! Don't even get started about sex! What the heck is that!? I don't want to have sex but when I feel good enough to it hurts so bad and I know he knows that Im not enjoying it, so i end up feeling bad!
WHY DO I HAVE A DISEASE THAT THEY CAN'T FIGURE OUT! I JUST WANT TO GET SOME RELIEF!
****Thank you for letting me vent, you guys are the only ones that understand**
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Dx: Crohn's 07/2010--Possible Carconoid Tumors--
Still not used to this...

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03-25-2011, 07:27 AM   #2
Crohns08
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Hey Britt,

I definitely know where you're at, it sucks so hardcore! But you have to keep faith that things will get better eventually and that nothing can be bad forever. I know it seems hard right now, but you have to sit down and think of the good things that you do have. You're getting married soon, that's a wonderful thing that you should be focused on.
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03-25-2011, 12:39 PM   #3
margie
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Britt,
I am so sorry that you are having such a rough time. We all know exactly what you are going through. This disease is absolutely horrible. We are the only ones that know our bodies, and I have had to fight with doctors telling me that it is all in my head, instead of pushing to find out what is going on.

I am here anytime you need to talk to someone. I hope that you can get some answers soon.

Hang in there!!!

Big Hug
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03-25-2011, 12:48 PM   #4
Terriernut
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Britt, you are in the right place to vent alright!!! Let er rip. (the farts too...we wont laugh, much , we'll just do it in concert!!!)

We sure hope you get some help soon, and feel better. Since crohn's is exaberated by stress, you dont need any more of that!

To your health, hugggs
Misty
03-25-2011, 12:52 PM   #5
ameslouise
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Oh, Britt, we have all been there. Let it all out, honey! Have yourself a good cry.

I know it sounds trite, but things will get better. Just hang in there. And if you can't plan a big wedding, just do what you can and maybe you can do something fancier when you are feeling better. It's all about you - and you need to feel better!

Hang in there! - Amy
03-25-2011, 03:30 PM   #6
Britt31109
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I just downed a bottle and a half of wine, and I feel horrible. WHy do I do this to myself. I am so depressed. I am moving up the wedding and cutting the guest list in half. Im bleeding so bad, and at this point I wonder how much blood a person can lose before I just pass out. I have an appt. at the Univ. of Chicago next week but the hospitals around me have given up on me. What do I do next. I just want to hide in my closet.
03-25-2011, 03:45 PM   #7
Terriernut
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First....do NOT finish the rest of the bottle!

Second, if you are bleeding that badly and flaring...why in heavens name aren't you being given pred?? (that wont help with your mood, but it does help with the inflamation)

Third...why do you think the hospitals have given up on you? Your inflammation markers should tell them the truth..if they are being twits, why? They need to let you see specialists! They wont give up on you luv, you WILL get thru this...promise!!!!!

Oh hon, I hope you get some help very soon!
Misty
03-25-2011, 03:48 PM   #8
Britt31109
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I threw away the bottle :^), I know its not going to change anything. They tried pred and it make my white blood cell count sky rocket so they immed. took me off of it. and they also tried just high doses of other steriods, but it did they same thing. My dr. told me that this is beyond his scope of practice and he can't do anything for me.
03-25-2011, 03:57 PM   #9
Terriernut
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Your normal Dr? What do they know about Crohn's...nada! How about a specialist???
Misty
03-25-2011, 03:59 PM   #10
Terriernut
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Oh, and if its the specialist not helping you..a GI...time to get another one...ASAP.

Misty
03-25-2011, 04:13 PM   #11
Britt31109
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My GI said that. I go to a Crohn's specialist at university of chicago on the 7th. I pray she can offer more insight
03-25-2011, 07:50 PM   #12
ameslouise
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I have to respect a doctor that admits they can't help you. Better than them fumbling their way around.

Have you tried Northwestern? I lived in Chicago when I was first DX with UC and was very happy there. But good luck at U Chicago. I hope you can get some relief soon.

I see you are already on Celexa. Ask your doc about a tricyclic antidepressant. They can also help with Crohn's symptoms like spasms and D.

Keep us posted and please, please, stay away from the wine!! - Amy
03-27-2011, 09:47 PM   #13
Britt31109
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no more wine i promise lol. Thank you guys, it really means so much to me. I will keep you posted on what University of Ch. says. hopefully good things..
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