I don't know how I ended up tagged for this section but I'm glad I did. I work for a lady (very part time) overseeing her special needs daughter and her housework. It sounds like your wife is in a similar situation to this lady I work for. She had cancer (only this was intestinal cancer) awhile ago and ended up in the hospital every few days due to her scarring from the radiation. the thoughts of even trying to eat were beyond comprehension around these times. She would end up in the hospital on a liquid diet and a lot of pain killers until things settled down, then she would go back home. the quality of life was really horrible. She finally opted for the surgery, and although she will always have “issues," she is so much better than she was. The doctors warned her that she could end up with a stoma also, but even if she did, she has so much less pain and her quality of life is next to normal. wouldn't that be worth it to see your wife going through less pain? I know very little medically however, and don't even have an IBD myself, my husband does, but I think you should discuss this as a couple and with your doctor(s). I am just speaking from an outside perspective, but you need to weigh all involved, including the quality of life for your wife. Good luck and God bless.