Nothing ever goes right it seems

I swear that nothing can ever go right for long. None of my current treatment plans seem to be helping and my disease is becoming active again. I'm even getting a bunch of mouth sores which is making eating harder that it already is. Not to mention all the stress of school and my job where I always get the short end of the stick. I just wish sometimes that something for at least a while would go my way. It's getting harder and harder to deal with everything and my anxiety and depression is getting worse from it all, but I don't want to see yet another doctor for it. Like today while I was at work I had to run into the bathroom just to cry because it is all too much to deal with right now. I'm only 20 and I just want to live my life like everyone else my age

Im sorry this desease is such a buren, I feel the same way. Although I got it when I was 30, it made everything a lot more difficult.
I dont know if you have the possibility to take a time out and just give yourself some space, but if you are, maybe some time to relax and remind yourself of the good things would be healthy. When things get so demanding, its not easy to hold it together and balanse it all.
hugs

Hi mascarim

You wrote "It's for sure been a big change in my life but not something I think I can't handle". Those are words of a fighter,and that is awesome! We get very tired of putting up the good fight at times.Your frustration and anger is valid.We have been given the short end of the stick,like you said.Do you have anyone to talk to?Someone you trust and can be open with?A teacher at school you trust?

Don't forget you have all the crohnies here in the Forum too.I know typing on a keyboard is not the same as being there with someone,but we are here for you.

I understand the feeling of being powerless against the disease. It's very depressing to be in such a situation. Adding stress on top of that makes it all worse. I'm in kind of a similar situation myself.

I would suggest taking a look at ways to manage or reduce stress, because of the effects it can have on your immune system. Anything from stress management techniques like meditation to finding a new job that is less stressful. Even if it takes a while or has to be done one step at a time, working towards getting your stress level under control may be worth it for your health.

I hope you can find some relief for the stress and depression, and also that you eventually find a treatment program that works for you.

Hi Mascarim,
I notice you are on Entocort. I recently started this and I have been very moody and to the point of crying. Did you recently start taking it? My doctor said it was a low dose of steroid and it shouldn't effect me much but I think that is what is causing me to be this way. I started running and I seem to be in a better mood. Maybe try doing something that makes you happy and see if that helps. I am sorry you are having a bad time.

I have done some yoga and meditation but I find it so hard to not be thinking about things all the time. I do have people to talk to, but it's hard when they don't really connect with what I'm going through or what it's like. and ash, actually I was on a high dose of Entocort and was given the wrong instructions and not told to wean off so i was told my adrenal gland is probably suppressed. When i first stopped cold turkey I was so emotional and mentally distraught I was basically pushing EVERYONE I loved away. It was awful and it has since calmed down a bit but I don't doubt that being extra emotional is still happening. I am also beginning to suspect my Remicade is starting to lose it's power xD I say that like it's magical haha well it was for a while. Right now I am supposed to be on it monthly but currently have no improvement whatsoever. Everything just seems to be getting worse. Worse stomach pain, mouth sores, really bad joint pain, and in the bathroom way more often than I'd like to be :/

You poor darling. I understand 100% when you're coming from. I've been there! You mentioned not wanting to see another doctor, and I totally get you because I was exactly the same - Until I eventually had a complete mental breakdown, and was hospitalised for a period of time. It may be worthwhile seeing a psychiatrist who specialises in helping those of us with chronic illnesses - It's saved my life, and has given me hope I never had before.

You don't have to suffer like you are now x